An Informal and Quite Complicated Thank You

A few days ago I was feeling like my world was ending. You could see my thought process deteriorating and at one point I wrote a lot of very depressing stuff. My best friend(who will hereby be referred to as TheAwesomePossum) swooped in and jolted me awake. She sent some pretty life-changing messages (which, being who I am, I decided to ignore) where she basically said to me that I'd accepted this whirlpool of self-hate and had put myself in this state of 'omg I'm a butt'. By not appreciating myself and ignoring all the good things (which I knew I had and she knew I knew this... Which is why I love her because she knew I knew this... Confused yet :P?) and my strengths, I was consciously making the choice to bring myself into a dark pit. 

This is the part of depression which is relative to each person. I'm not saying I'm qualified to become a spokesperson about the struggle being real. Neither am I saying I am not someone you should listen to. What I'm saying is a load of bullshit that I can't word because I seem to be unable to write this fine morning-- you can bring yourself out of whatever torrential downpour of hate you've inflicted upon yourself by listening to the people around you. 

Doesn't matter why you hate yourself. If you're like me and you've got a friend like TheAwesomePossum (and I'm pretty sure you don't because she's one of a kind) then listen to them! 

I can't make sweeping statements like before where I used to cackle in the face of fear and when the whirlpool of hate wasn't something so encompassing. Those were the days when I knew that the whirlpool could be contained within the confines of the bathroom sink and when I washed my face of the tears and snot encouraged by my self-pity. Those were the times of hyperbole and exaggeration, when I could throw around terms like 'woe' and 'despair' without actually feeling them rip my chest apart. I can't say: depression is gone and I have defeated that egregious foe!!!! I know that there will be times when this black-hearted villain will creep up on me. There will be times where I will lose a few skirmishes. But in the end, I know I'll be victorious because I've got some fierce allies by my side. 

Codename TheAwesomePossum gave me a mix of tough love and cyber hugs and even though the ugly beast of depression may rear its head again, she's helped me deal it a few injuries and I don't see a threat in the foreseeable future. 

In a roundabout way I've used an extended metaphor to thank TheAwesomePossum because each time I try to start thanking her it comes out weird, like this morning's questions on trust and if she can keep my secrets -.- I'm sorry I can't articulate things properly and no, you don't have to reassure the 13 year old in me of your trustworthiness. 

And so I shall sign off leaving you all envious of me for having my wonderful friend,  TheAwesomePossum. Come to think of it, she's more of a unicorn but considering her ability to stomach the most appalling of confessions and yours truly's atrocious spelling mistakes, I know she'll appreciate the connotations behind the label and will see it as synonymous with terms like 'magic unicorn', 'sensational Sasquatch', 'cool koala bear', and most importantly: my best friend.